My Dad My love

Sometimes I think I have the world’s best dad. I talk to him about anything without any hesitation. He is understanding when we talk about personal issues. He is advise when I am lost.I tell him dad I like a guy and he would say ta chit la gul!! That is where I see a blind trust. I love you dadyy!! I tell him dad I have cramps and he buys me brufin because he knows it helps reduce the pain. He is hope when life brings hopelessness. He is a helping hand when needs knock my door. My bank account where I can withdraw money from anytime. We disagree too but that doesn’t put an end to our friendship. I can’t be more blessed!! Miss you ma zhan dady heart emoticon. I am my papas priceless princess and he is my life.



The starving late night bird!!!


Last night when I woke up out of dream my stomach was shrinking and I felt like stones are walking in its lane.  I knew I was starving to death.  The only thing  at the moment I could serve myself was ” Biscuits” . I ate one after another but due to empty stomach my mouth wanted something very tasty and soft to help balance itself. Since it was very late and everyone was sleeping.  The very moment dry biscuit stuck on my throat I saw a bottle of water to help get rid of it.  AAAAh! Biscuit and water go the best together. One by one with every sip of water I finished the very packet of biscuit. My mouth did not complain again because it could not accept dry biscuits I served it soaked one instead pretending as if I am drinking ” Hot TRUP Chai” .

Last night water and biscuit saved my life, I am much thankful 🙂

One fine evening with my generous self!

There is a separate corner attached with my room (Balcony) where I usually spend my time with myself. A place that connects me to nature where I spend some solo time with my guitar while listening to some suffi mystical music mostly to Roomi and Shams. My place does not have lights though, but I can see everything crystal. Right now, wide open in front of me is a huge and a never ending sky fully covered with stars that are hardly visible but I can imagine them shinning up there. Straight to the front from where I am siting now a building can be seen which is not fully constructed yet. Seriously!! See the skeleton of the building it looks so rough but then see the magic after it is completely built I am amazed how it can handle the natural evil, the earthquake!!  Then at a distance, there is a tall tower atop of which red light blinks. Do you know what it makes me think of? It makes me think what if we combine more and different colors to it what would it look like? Well, colors always add to beauty of anything. Just take an example of this universe itself. How would you feel if you enter a garden and see everything around is the same color. Just imagine how would everything around us a tree, a garden, soil, mountains, sky, the glittering stars, the shinning sun, my favorite happy moon be, if they were of the same color? We would not differentiate which one is what right? I think it’s very essential for us to learn about the prominence of colors in life. Colors are beautiful and without colors life would be just like an old building staring at me from a distance from here now. I can see the rotten leaves of the trees turning brown and the rust metaled building spreading vibes of being haunted. Hold on while I look deep through the building. Though I am sitting in a dark place too, however I can see all sorts of beauty around. Well sometimes embracing darkness can be beautiful too. You see how clearly through darkness I can witness things around. I can even see the haunted house. One two three yea the number of stories in this building are three. I wonder who might have lived there and I wish there is some way I could know why this house is left empty. I at times have even imagined this house full of people, jubilant kids and the smell of food coming cooked by a mother. How would that be just imagine. At the moment something else is dragging my attention and I can’t ignore it. Damn these mosquitoes, so biased even the mosquitoes in Bangladesh are. They are anti-Pakistani. Just like the political authorities have problems issuing us visa no matter how badly we need it, these mosquitoes will never get off my butt, sucking my blood. So yea we were talking about the importance of colors in life. Sometime it’s like as a person we might go fade in color within ourselves, but life goes on. Life never leaves the colors off for one person or two or three. As an analogy, just like I am sitting in darkness but can witness colors around in the shape of stars in the sky, the sky itself, the red light on top of the tower, lights everywhere in each households. No matter at times for some reasons we might feel like the haunted house complete colorless but that’s not how we want our viewers  to assess us Ugly and dull when people look at us from a distance right?

We have to be our own sun shine, our own splashing moon, our own sparkly stars, our own green, blue red, purple, off white and the list is endless and most of the time combinations of every color.

PS I am not saying we should avoid looking at the haunted house or be gloomy. Nope, we must feel gloomy and sad and terrible and irritated at times or else we would never know what it means to be colorful.


Finally after enough of talking to my tiresome being today, I came out with different colored butterflies in my mental sky from that dark corner of my space where I have been sitting from 2 hours.